3 Ways the NHL Can Really Bring Back Fans

With respect to our esteemed colleagues at The Hockey Writers, we feel that their “5 Ways the NHL Can Bring Back Fans,” is not the answer. Sure, allowing people to see the games… Continue reading

NHL Fans All Think They’re Lawyers Now After Reading 3 Articles About Labor Dispute

Many NHL fans believe they have enough legal knowledge to be lawyers after reading a few articles about the labor dispute between the NHL owners and the NHLPA, an investigation by REAL Hockey… Continue reading

If NHL Ever Comes Back, Next Two Stanley Cups Awarded to Colorado Avalanche Because Opponents Will Be Stoned

NHL commissioner Gary Bettman has announced that the new marijuana legalization bill in Colorado will force the league to award the next two Stanley Cups to the Colorado Avalanche because opponents will be… Continue reading

NHL to Bring in Replacement Players; Season To Begin On Time

National Hockey League commissioner Gary Bettman has announced that the league will bypass negotiations with the players’ union and bring in replacement players to begin the 2012-13 NHL season on time. “Hockey fans… Continue reading

Despite Replacement Referees, NHL Fans are Envious of NFL Fans Because At Least the NFL Has Games

During Monday Night Football broadcasts on Monday night, millions of Americans complained relentlessly via Twitter, Facebook, and bar stools about the NFL’s replacement referees who are refereeing in place of actual NFL referees.… Continue reading

Flyers’ Scott Hartnell Accidentally Joins Ku Klux Klan

The Philadelphia Flyers’ left winger Scott Hartnell accidentally joined the Ku Klux Klan on Sunday night, due to the player’s confusion over what the letters “KKK” meant, witnesses say. “He thought it stood… Continue reading

Barack Obama to Prevent NHL Lockout in Attempt to Attract White Voters

President Barack Obama is in full campaign mode as he announced a plan that analysts believe will guarantee him a re-election victory this November:winning the majority of white voters by preventing an NHL… Continue reading

Milan Lucic to Play Meth Addict on Season Finale of ‘Breaking Bad’

Milan Lucic, the Boston Bruins’ hard-hitting goal-scorer, will guest star in the season finale of Breaking Bad and play a meth-addled junkie, producers of the hit show have announced. Lucic said the character… Continue reading

Patrick Kane Announces He Will Play Hockey in Nicaragua During Lockout Because of Country’s ‘Awesome Beaches and Chicks’

Chicago Blackhawks forward Patrick Kane has announced that he will not play in Europe in the event of a lockout during the 2012-13 NHL season like many of his fellow NHLers, but will… Continue reading

NHL Players Looking Forward to Playing Lots of ‘EA Sports NHL 13’ During 2012-13 Season

The NHLPA has announced today that its player members are looking forward to playing a lot of EA Sports NHL 13 this season since they won’t have to play real hockey. “It’s going… Continue reading